Why I sit in the morning - by Mark Ludak

Since September, we have been sitting for 30 minutes every morning M-F via Zoom. It's an open meditation, minimally led, and for me, it’s the first thing I do in the morning. I wake, take a seat on the cushion, log into Zoom and open the space for anyone who has an inclination within our sangha to join.

My butt is not drawn like a moth to the flame of the cushion, but there is a consistent return, there is a force is at work, even to raise the thought of sitting. So I return. In meditation, we are taught to practice returning awareness to the breath from our storylines, our I-making, our hopes, our fears, our ideas of the world. It's returning to the breath that is important, not our inability to keep our minds focused on the breath and away from thoughts. The mind is simply doing what minds do.  With patience and confidence, we eventually lose interest in thoughts as awareness settles in the body. We are taught that we can not think ourselves out of this feedback loop of I-making. It's true.  I try almost daily and fail every time.  So again and again, with compassion, returning to the breathing body, being with one another, and being in the world. Sometimes I can maintain this awareness beyond the cushion and the comfort of my shrine room at home: to the photography studio, to interactions with troubled students during these troubled times, or meeting strangers with their dogs on the trails I hike with my dog and friends.  Daily sitting helps me be more balanced, embodied and, clearer in experiencing the world and who knows where that can lead. 

I sit with others in the morning and attend sangha gatherings to support them on their paths. The more I support others, the more I feel supported. Sitting with a group, even via Zoom, reconfirms goodness, compassion, and metta in the world. It sets a tone for the day or at least offers a reminder that this perfect jewel of meditation, sangha, and wisdom is available if we choose. I sit in the morning because, however long, this human life is brief and the rarest of chances.

Late Fragment - Raymond Carver
And did you get what
you wanted from this life, even so?
I did.
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved, to feel myself
beloved on the earth.

Join morning meditations with Mark and friends, Mon-Fri, 7-7:40am. These will run all through the holiday season. Here is the link.